Nabtundag is a god.

She takes the form of a slim, stupid gerbil.

Nabtundag created an electron seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Nabtundag, she will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Nabtundag, she will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Nabtundag's most sacred site is Altata in Mexico.

Nabtundag's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

2. Always make sure there are no geese in a room before entering it.

3. Nabtundag loves tapirs, so they must be respected.

4. Do not chop down trees.

5. Never write about comets.