Jabkadwod Cuthadkad is a god.

He takes the form of a very fat, ill-tempered unicorn.

Jabkadwod Cuthadkad created the Andromeda Galaxy three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Jabkadwod Cuthadkad, he will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Jabkadwod Cuthadkad, he will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Jabkadwod Cuthadkad's most sacred site is Polydrosos in Greece.

Jabkadwod Cuthadkad's Holy Commandments

1. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

2. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

3. Do not cook food in pots.

4. Do not stand on grass.

5. Do not drink water in white rooms.