Gudgemjap is a god.

She takes the form of a fat, flying fairy.

Gudgemjap created humankind two billion years ago.

If you believe in Gudgemjap, she will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Gudgemjap, she will turn you into a tree.

Gudgemjap's most sacred site is Kardous in Egypt.

Gudgemjap's Holy Commandments

1. Your children must be taught to worship Gudgemjap.

2. Foxes are unholy and should not be approached.

3. Always pray immersed in water.

4. Never talk about fire.

5. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Gudgemjap.