Sinpigyogtagcutbemcib is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely heavy, happy seal.

Sinpigyogtagcutbemcib created the Andromeda Galaxy six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Sinpigyogtagcutbemcib, he will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Sinpigyogtagcutbemcib, he will throw large rocks at you.

Sinpigyogtagcutbemcib's most sacred site is Gadna in Hungary.

Sinpigyogtagcutbemcib's Holy Commandments

1. Never sing in holy places.

2. Erect nine platinum sculptures of Sinpigyogtagcutbemcib on top of important buildings.

3. Never feed corn to mice while wearing green boots.

4. Worship no other gods but Sinpigyogtagcutbemcib.

5. Do not shave your head.