Funhadhiv Kambudjam is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely small, quiet tapir.

Funhadhiv Kambudjam created Asia five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Funhadhiv Kambudjam, she will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Funhadhiv Kambudjam, she will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Funhadhiv Kambudjam's most sacred site is Qantir in Egypt.

Funhadhiv Kambudjam's Holy Commandments

1. Do not cook food in pots.

2. Never go into violet rooms.

3. Always stare at clouds.

4. Never think about moons.

5. Funhadhiv Kambudjam loves mites, so they must be honoured.