Narlpoptapnelyogyattbamgub is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely thin, idiotic swan.

Narlpoptapnelyogyattbamgub created vertebrates five million years ago.

If you believe in Narlpoptapnelyogyattbamgub, it will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Narlpoptapnelyogyattbamgub, it will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Narlpoptapnelyogyattbamgub's most sacred site is Littoinen in Finland.

Narlpoptapnelyogyattbamgub's Holy Commandments

1. Never bounce near badgers.

2. Never mention whales.

3. Do not fashion models of living things.

4. Never paint your head indigo.

5. Never look in ponds.