Xemmitgub is a god.

He takes the form of a massive, blissful unicorn.

Xemmitgub created Asia five million years ago.

If you believe in Xemmitgub, he will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Xemmitgub, he will destroy your favourite solar system.

Xemmitgub's most sacred site is Corsock in Scotland.

Xemmitgub's Holy Commandments

1. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

2. Do not hurt monkeys.

3. Never write about the strong nuclear force.

4. Never eat green fruit.

5. Always help bats in need.