Lenmidqueegmonxinzagsat is a god.

She takes the form of a rotund, all-powerful frog.

Lenmidqueegmonxinzagsat created Africa seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Lenmidqueegmonxinzagsat, she will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Lenmidqueegmonxinzagsat, she will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Lenmidqueegmonxinzagsat's most sacred site is Kgope in Botswana.

Lenmidqueegmonxinzagsat's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat wheat.

2. Never talk about snakes.

3. Erect a large iron sculpture of Lenmidqueegmonxinzagsat on top of all buildings.

4. Aardvarks are not to be trusted.

5. Look mercifully on unfortunate tortoises.