Fumflamstafloopken Loparmjen is a god.

She takes the form of a four hundred metre long, contented butterfly.

Fumflamstafloopken Loparmjen created bats six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fumflamstafloopken Loparmjen, she will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Fumflamstafloopken Loparmjen, she will destroy your home galaxy.

Fumflamstafloopken Loparmjen's most sacred site is Elatos in Greece.

Fumflamstafloopken Loparmjen's Holy Commandments

1. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

2. Show mercy to disobedient children.

3. Never think ill of sick capybaras.

4. Do not wear aluminium on your body.

5. Fumflamstafloopken Loparmjen loves shrews, so they must be honoured.