Dussnarmob is a god.

She takes the form of a galaxy-sized, ill-tempered parrot.

Dussnarmob created a Higgs boson eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Dussnarmob, she will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Dussnarmob, she will jump up and down on your head.

Dussnarmob's most sacred site is Manja in Madagascar.

Dussnarmob's Holy Commandments

1. Do not trade with those who eat strawberries.

2. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Dussnarmob.

3. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

4. Do not speak about onions.

5. Dussnarmob loves tortoises, so they must be respected.