Nibvedbim Mipflapbem Pascancip is a god.

She takes the form of a giant, tiresome rat.

Nibvedbim Mipflapbem Pascancip created viruses three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Nibvedbim Mipflapbem Pascancip, she will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Nibvedbim Mipflapbem Pascancip, she will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Nibvedbim Mipflapbem Pascancip's most sacred site is Utti in Finland.

Nibvedbim Mipflapbem Pascancip's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

2. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

3. Always make a point of helping unfortunate hamsters.

4. Never mention capybaras.

5. Do not listen to heathen tongues.