Bodxuckvin is a god.

She takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, charitable penguin.

Bodxuckvin created dark energy twelve years ago.

If you believe in Bodxuckvin, she will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Bodxuckvin, she will laugh at you.

Bodxuckvin's most sacred site is Brechfa in Wales.

Bodxuckvin's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a large iron sculpture of Bodxuckvin on top of all buildings.

2. Feed all hungry snails.

3. Do not commit murder.

4. Do not wear lead on your body.

5. Show mercy to disobedient children.