Yiklenwatjop is a god.

He takes the form of a very heavy, fast cow.

Yiklenwatjop created water seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Yiklenwatjop, he will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Yiklenwatjop, he will refuse to believe in you.

Yiklenwatjop's most sacred site is Dumadumana in Botswana.

Yiklenwatjop's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about black holes.

2. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

3. Never look in ponds.

4. Never think about gravity.

5. Do not speak about gooseberries.