Watnarfun Dincabfon is a god.

She takes the form of a galaxy-sized, smart slug.

Watnarfun Dincabfon created carbon six million years ago.

If you believe in Watnarfun Dincabfon, she will be happy.

If you do not believe in Watnarfun Dincabfon, she will turn you into a frog.

Watnarfun Dincabfon's most sacred site is Troms in Norway.

Watnarfun Dincabfon's Holy Commandments

1. Always take life seriously.

2. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Never sing near sharks.

4. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

5. Never eat green fruit.