Dinzakfatgen Vonkmingad is a god.

It takes the form of a small, happy bat.

Dinzakfatgen Vonkmingad created Mount Everest two years ago.

If you believe in Dinzakfatgen Vonkmingad, it will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Dinzakfatgen Vonkmingad, it will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

Dinzakfatgen Vonkmingad's most sacred site is Bogogobo in Botswana.

Dinzakfatgen Vonkmingad's Holy Commandments

1. Look mercifully on unfortunate seals.

2. Run away if three dogs approach from the north.

3. Do not take Dinzakfatgen Vonkmingad's name in vain.

4. Respect your elders.

5. Do not stand on grass.