Tettilancit Rullxuckfub is a god.

It takes the form of a fat, witless troll.

Tettilancit Rullxuckfub created matter seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Tettilancit Rullxuckfub, it will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Tettilancit Rullxuckfub, it will have a very low opinion of you.

Tettilancit Rullxuckfub's most sacred site is Sirama in Madagascar.

Tettilancit Rullxuckfub's Holy Commandments

1. Always obey Tettilancit Rullxuckfub's priests.

2. Do not kill sharks.

3. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

4. Always help rats in need.

5. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.
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