Queegjiport Gudcanyik is a god.

It takes the form of a plump, pitiless raven.

Queegjiport Gudcanyik created dark energy seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Queegjiport Gudcanyik, it will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Queegjiport Gudcanyik, it will turn you into a mole.

Queegjiport Gudcanyik's most sacred site is Laurila in Finland.

Queegjiport Gudcanyik's Holy Commandments

1. Queegjiport Gudcanyik must be the most important thing in your life.

2. Always pray immersed in water.

3. Your children must be taught to worship Queegjiport Gudcanyik.

4. You must love Queegjiport Gudcanyik.

5. Never paint your back indigo.