Narpoddin Armfomfub is a god.

She takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, staggering guinea pig.

Narpoddin Armfomfub created the Cigar Galaxy seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Narpoddin Armfomfub, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Narpoddin Armfomfub, she will throw large rocks at you.

Narpoddin Armfomfub's most sacred site is Saint-Sauvan in France.

Narpoddin Armfomfub's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat green fruit.

2. Your children must be taught to worship Narpoddin Armfomfub.

3. Respect your elders.

4. Do not shave your chest.

5. Never pour water over plants.