Janfemvan is a god.

He takes the form of a four hundred metre long, merciful crocodile.

Janfemvan created the Sombrero Galaxy four million years ago.

If you believe in Janfemvan, he will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Janfemvan, he will turn you into a hamster.

Janfemvan's most sacred site is Farnetta in Italy.

Janfemvan's Holy Commandments

1. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

2. Look mercifully on unfortunate moths.

3. Your children must be taught to worship Janfemvan.

4. Never bounce in the presence of voles.

5. Do not covet oxen.