Zenmifrill is a god.

He takes the form of a very long, calm alligator.

Zenmifrill created dark matter two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Zenmifrill, he will be happy.

If you do not believe in Zenmifrill, he will try to impress you with trees.

Zenmifrill's most sacred site is Qangwa in Botswana.

Zenmifrill's Holy Commandments

1. Do not covet oxen.

2. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

3. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

4. Show mercy to disobedient children.

5. Never mention whales.