Hinlidbat is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly fat, unthoughtful skunk.

Hinlidbat created dark energy eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Hinlidbat, it will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Hinlidbat, it will turn you into a hamster.

Hinlidbat's most sacred site is Dumadumana in Botswana.

Hinlidbat's Holy Commandments

1. Always help sick swans.

2. Never eat green fruit.

3. Never look in ponds.

4. Never write about cell theory.

5. Do not chop down trees.