Bemsinduss is a god.

She takes the form of a huge, proud finch.

Bemsinduss created vertebrates two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bemsinduss, she will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Bemsinduss, she will ignore you and hope you go away.

Bemsinduss' most sacred site is Dimson in England.

Bemsinduss' Holy Commandments

1. Squirrels are unholy and should not be approached.

2. Never talk about horizontal gene transfer.

3. Do not make images of living things.

4. Always take life seriously.

5. Never hurt foxes.