Cimcemrag is a god.

It takes the form of a two thousand metre long, humorless fish.

Cimcemrag created parasitic wasps six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Cimcemrag, it will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Cimcemrag, it will refuse to believe in you.

Cimcemrag's most sacred site is Daraina in Madagascar.

Cimcemrag's Holy Commandments

1. Never look in ponds.

2. Do not take Cimcemrag's name in vain.

3. Never write about horizontal gene transfer.

4. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Cimcemrag.

5. Erect a large tin sculpture of Cimcemrag on top of all buildings.