Jarnfadboss is a god.

It takes the form of a massive, prudent ferret.

Jarnfadboss created a top quark eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Jarnfadboss, it will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Jarnfadboss, it will jump up and down on your head.

Jarnfadboss' most sacred site is Bokaa in Botswana.

Jarnfadboss' Holy Commandments

1. Fast once a month.

2. Never eat green fruit.

3. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

4. Never skip near ants.

5. You must pray to Jarnfadboss five times a day.