Zidzistflap is a god.

It takes the form of a microscopic, unjust scorpion.

Zidzistflap created dark energy three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Zidzistflap, it will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Zidzistflap, it will attempt to scare you with floods.

Zidzistflap's most sacred site is Temmes in Finland.

Zidzistflap's Holy Commandments

1. Put Zidzistflap first in all things.

2. Always help seals in need.

3. Never talk about black holes.

4. Never write about the weak nuclear force.

5. Do not commit murder.