Getdubfas is a god.

He takes the form of a small, proud squid.

Getdubfas created water three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Getdubfas, he will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Getdubfas, he will turn you into a plant.

Getdubfas' most sacred site is Poloka in Botswana.

Getdubfas' Holy Commandments

1. Never write about the weak nuclear force.

2. Do not wear nickel on your body.

3. Never write about comets.

4. Do not fashion models of living things.

5. Always look both ways before crossing roads.