Bassfarjab is a god.

She takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, egotistical clam.

Bassfarjab created the world four years ago.

If you believe in Bassfarjab, she will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Bassfarjab, she will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Bassfarjab's most sacred site is Anony in Madagascar.

Bassfarjab's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to music.

2. Never think about black holes.

3. Worship no other gods but Bassfarjab.

4. Do not hurt nematodes.

5. Never talk about fire.