Nigfatvil is a god.

It takes the form of a five thousand metre long, thoughtless gorilla.

Nigfatvil created the planet Saturn six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Nigfatvil, it will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Nigfatvil, it will sneak up behind you and tap you on the back.

Nigfatvil's most sacred site is Edenryd in Sweden.

Nigfatvil's Holy Commandments

1. Never look at comets.

2. You must love Nigfatvil.

3. Retreat if nine geese approach from the east.

4. Do not make images of living things.

5. Never wear scarves.