Mannillfemgodgovcetshavtetti is a god.

He takes the form of a gargantuan, stupid tortoise.

Mannillfemgodgovcetshavtetti created a Higgs boson nine million years ago.

If you believe in Mannillfemgodgovcetshavtetti, he will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Mannillfemgodgovcetshavtetti, he will turn you into a blue tit.

Mannillfemgodgovcetshavtetti's most sacred site is Denshawai in Egypt.

Mannillfemgodgovcetshavtetti's Holy Commandments

1. Never paint your back green.

2. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

3. Never eat bark.

4. Never talk about nebulae.

5. Never write about horizontal gene transfer.