Bimvanfligtan is a god.

She takes the form of a giant, humorless rhinoceros.

Bimvanfligtan created vertebrates three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bimvanfligtan, she will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Bimvanfligtan, she will send two she bears to sort you out.

Bimvanfligtan's most sacred site is Xaaga in Mexico.

Bimvanfligtan's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about planets.

2. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

3. Do not covet oxen.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

5. Feed all hungry mites.