Cebkinpom is a god.

She takes the form of a small, awe-inspiring eagle.

Cebkinpom created dark energy nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Cebkinpom, she will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Cebkinpom, she will turn you into a giant snail.

Cebkinpom's most sacred site is Dumadumana in Botswana.

Cebkinpom's Holy Commandments

1. Do not hurt gulls.

2. Always make sure there are no tortoises in a building before entering it.

3. Never skip near moths.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

5. Erect a large iron sculpture of Cebkinpom on top of all buildings.