Staftanfab Yikqueegwad is a god.

She takes the form of a slim, dishonourable rhinoceros.

Staftanfab Yikqueegwad created parasitic wasps seven million years ago.

If you believe in Staftanfab Yikqueegwad, she will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Staftanfab Yikqueegwad, she will attempt to scare you with earthquakes.

Staftanfab Yikqueegwad's most sacred site is Evol in France.

Staftanfab Yikqueegwad's Holy Commandments

1. Staftanfab Yikqueegwad must be the most important thing in your life.

2. Never look at moons.

3. Pray towards the south.

4. Never think ill of sick sharks.

5. Run away from indigo aardvarks, for they are unholy.