Stipvenwot is a god.

She takes the form of a massive, flying raven.

Stipvenwot created Asia three billion years ago.

If you believe in Stipvenwot, she will be happy.

If you do not believe in Stipvenwot, she will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Stipvenwot's most sacred site is Aguaruto in Mexico.

Stipvenwot's Holy Commandments

1. Run away if seven tortoises approach from the north.

2. Never think about evolution by means of natural selection.

3. Never think about planets.

4. Do not cook food in pots.

5. Never skip near dolphins.