Cibvondad is a god.

She takes the form of a gargantuan, overgenerous squid.

Cibvondad created a quark eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Cibvondad, she will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Cibvondad, she will be very sad.

Cibvondad's most sacred site is Sarti in Greece.

Cibvondad's Holy Commandments

1. Do not kill aardvarks.

2. Never go into purple rooms.

3. Never wear hats.

4. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

5. Do not shave your arms.