Ruttominhun Hasbedtag is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly fat, thoughtless armadillo.

Ruttominhun Hasbedtag created the Sun four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Ruttominhun Hasbedtag, she will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Ruttominhun Hasbedtag, she will turn you into a mouse.

Ruttominhun Hasbedtag's most sacred site is Kottucherry in India.

Ruttominhun Hasbedtag's Holy Commandments

1. Hide if nine whales approach from the north.

2. Do not shave your back.

3. Always wear violet.

4. Always make sure there are no horses in a building before entering it.

5. Do not eat melons.