Padgumfeb is a god.

She takes the form of a very thin, able elephant.

Padgumfeb created a photon six million years ago.

If you believe in Padgumfeb, she will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Padgumfeb, she will turn you into a plant.

Padgumfeb's most sacred site is Poloka in Botswana.

Padgumfeb's Holy Commandments

1. Do not speak about tomatoes.

2. Never look in ponds.

3. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

4. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

5. Do not kill dogs.