Wikbednil is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly fat, impressive scorpion.

Wikbednil created a top quark nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Wikbednil, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Wikbednil, she will ignore you.

Wikbednil's most sacred site is Buskerud in Norway.

Wikbednil's Holy Commandments

1. Never look in ponds.

2. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

3. You must love Wikbednil.

4. Do not hurt capybaras.

5. Your children must be taught to worship Wikbednil.