Yatnellciss is a god.

He takes the form of a giant, selfish goblin.

Yatnellciss created a Higgs boson twelve years ago.

If you believe in Yatnellciss, he will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Yatnellciss, he will not care at all.

Yatnellciss' most sacred site is Rutalahti in Finland.

Yatnellciss' Holy Commandments

1. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

2. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

3. Hide from violet pigs for they are unholy.

4. Always obey Yatnellciss' priests.

5. Never talk about fire.