Lipnarnig is a god.

She takes the form of a four hundred metre long, unsympathetic hedgehog.

Lipnarnig created snails two million years ago.

If you believe in Lipnarnig, she will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Lipnarnig, she will come to you in dreams.

Lipnarnig's most sacred site is Manna in Greece.

Lipnarnig's Holy Commandments

1. Never look in ponds.

2. Never go into mauve rooms.

3. Pray towards the east.

4. Do not kill sharks.

5. Lipnarnig loves nematodes, so they must be honoured.