Yamwigyak is a god.

She takes the form of a corpulent, humane armadillo.

Yamwigyak created matter seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Yamwigyak, she will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Yamwigyak, she will turn you into a worm.

Yamwigyak's most sacred site is Villaseta in Italy.

Yamwigyak's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray in complete darkness.

2. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

3. Never write about asteroids.

4. Respect your elders.

5. Never laugh in holy places.