Nuljamcin is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely heavy, contented hare.

Nuljamcin created dark energy nine million years ago.

If you believe in Nuljamcin, he will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Nuljamcin, he will manifest in front of you.

Nuljamcin's most sacred site is Kauvatsa in Finland.

Nuljamcin's Holy Commandments

1. Never paint your chest blue.

2. Never eat bark.

3. Never look at galaxies.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

5. Never talk about stars.