Larpjiplidmeg is a god.

It takes the form of a very heavy, unfair jellyfish.

Larpjiplidmeg created an up quark nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Larpjiplidmeg, it will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Larpjiplidmeg, it will hide angry, poisonous snakes in your dwelling place.

Larpjiplidmeg's most sacred site is Quellendorf in Germany.

Larpjiplidmeg's Holy Commandments

1. Never mention seals.

2. Never write about amino acids.

3. Always pray immersed in water.

4. Larpjiplidmeg loves geese, so they must be honoured.

5. Do not sit in public.