Flabtimpod is a god.

She takes the form of a massive, capable unicorn.

Flabtimpod created the Large Magellanic Cloud four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Flabtimpod, she will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Flabtimpod, she will hide angry, poisonous spiders in your dwelling place.

Flabtimpod's most sacred site is Metsimotlhabe in Botswana.

Flabtimpod's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about whales.

2. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

3. Do not fashion models of living things.

4. Worship no other gods but Flabtimpod.

5. Never eat bark.