Cemfodweg is a god.

It takes the form of a slender, weak beaver.

Cemfodweg created a Higgs boson four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Cemfodweg, it will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Cemfodweg, it will try to impress you with trees.

Cemfodweg's most sacred site is Makopong in Botswana.

Cemfodweg's Holy Commandments

1. Always take life seriously.

2. Hide if five otters approach from the west.

3. Erect a giant orange sculpture of Cemfodweg in the centre of the settlement.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

5. Run away from brown badgers, for they are unholy.