Flatpibfemdusszoddud is a god.

He takes the form of a massive, unjust zebra.

Flatpibfemdusszoddud created the Whirlpool Galaxy seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Flatpibfemdusszoddud, he will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Flatpibfemdusszoddud, he will turn you into a puffin.

Flatpibfemdusszoddud's most sacred site is Katballe in Denmark.

Flatpibfemdusszoddud's Holy Commandments

1. Do not kill great tits.

2. Do not chop down trees.

3. Do not wear turquoise clothing.

4. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

5. Never write about stars.