Ganquillbig is a god.

He takes the form of a galaxy-sized, sapient raven.

Ganquillbig created a bottom quark five million years ago.

If you believe in Ganquillbig, he will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Ganquillbig, he will turn you into an amoeba.

Ganquillbig's most sacred site is Miiluranta in Finland.

Ganquillbig's Holy Commandments

1. Your children must be taught to worship Ganquillbig.

2. Always help sick moths.

3. Frogs are unholy and should not be approached.

4. Always stare at clouds.

5. Shrews are not to be trusted.