Fitbissflagjad is a god.

She takes the form of a galaxy-sized, all-knowing hare.

Fitbissflagjad created the Small Magellanic Cloud five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fitbissflagjad, she will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Fitbissflagjad, she will turn you into a giant snail.

Fitbissflagjad's most sacred site is Gadna in Hungary.

Fitbissflagjad's Holy Commandments

1. Never laugh near ants.

2. Do not chop down trees.

3. Do not commit murder.

4. Your children must be taught to worship Fitbissflagjad.

5. Run away if three squirrels approach from the west.