Motarnbonk is a god.

It takes the form of a chunky, contented dugong.

Motarnbonk created a photon five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Motarnbonk, it will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Motarnbonk, it will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.

Motarnbonk's most sacred site is Paavola in Finland.

Motarnbonk's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a large titanium sculpture of Motarnbonk on top of all buildings.

2. Always pray in complete darkness.

3. Do not kill ants.

4. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

5. Do not eat corn.