Stantofnan is a god.

It takes the form of a gargantuan, charitable gorilla.

Stantofnan created the solar system seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Stantofnan, it will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Stantofnan, it will refuse to believe in you.

Stantofnan's most sacred site is Landsort in Sweden.

Stantofnan's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about evolution by means of natural selection.

2. Do not kill dogs.

3. Do not chop down trees.

4. Always help ants in need.

5. You must never eat grapes.