Sabhatxuc is a god.

He takes the form of a minute, clever bear.

Sabhatxuc created vertebrates nine million years ago.

If you believe in Sabhatxuc, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Sabhatxuc, he will have an extremely low opinion of you.

Sabhatxuc's most sacred site is Aranganur in India.

Sabhatxuc's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about electromagnetism.

2. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Sabhatxuc.

3. Do not covet oxen.

4. Put Sabhatxuc first in all things.

5. You must love Sabhatxuc.